bin-Laden: "Zarqawi Is BAD PR!"
This recording just in, from my super-secret Deep Throat-Nose-& Ear source in the NSA (Wiretap Division, Illegal Section).
Tip of the Karridine Stutson to Saint Pancake; and David Burge? Eatcher heart out! Bwahaha!
binLaden to Ahmad!
‘Allo? Ahmad here- Oh, yes, YESSIR bin-Laden! I am awake.
What? Hear WHAT news?
Zarqawi is DEAD? DEAD?
How did this happ… Uh-huh, yes… I saw him fire the manly weapon! What?
No, Sir, I didn’t see the out-takes… he was inept? He was fumbling? He was surrounded by clowns? HE was HUMILIATED?
But Sir, that would humiliate YOU-
What? The blogosphere is saying WHAT?
“The monster who introduced the world to videoed beheadings is dead!”
Uh, yes, yessir, yes Habibi, this is VERY BAD PR!
WHO gets credit? What do you mean-
Oh. Yes, uh-huh… so you’re saying WE tipped off the Great Satan Soldiers to know where Zarqawi was? And they do the deed, we cry, boo-hoo, and now we can transform Zarkawi into a martyr?
Like Chee Gweevarrah? Who’s he? Oh, the guy on mudflaps and T-shirts and urinal splash-guards… Sir? Why do we want this?
"To remember Zarqman as a Hero of the Cause!"
Yes, Mister bin Laden, Sir, if you say so, Sir. I’ll start immediately, with BBC:
“Zarkman, Manly Burly Man Who Killed Children With Passion and Flair!”
You’ll see it on the news, Sir!